I had a BBQ a couple weeks back and a couple of us were talking shit about some shitty people, naturally. Levi pointed out that I didn't like anyone. It wasn't a stark realization that I'm introverted and unfriendly, but it certainly proved the point that I'm just a rude guy to most people.
I could compromise and make everyone feel happy-happy-joy-joy when they are around me, but is it even worth it? I don't feel like myself when I'm Mr. KissAss, and I'm debating on whether that is a good or bad thing, or just a thing.
Here is an example from the other day:
I'm in the gym, some egotistical turd of a guy decides to spray me down with beta on something I've never tried, something that I would like to figure out on my own. Would I say "Oh gosh, thanks for showing me, I didn't even have to ask!" or would I say, "Kindly fuck off, spray yourself while you urinate instead of spraying me." Normally I would gravitate to the second one, but I landed somewhere in between with a blank stare at him with no words. Yes, he was only trying to help, but clearly it shows that he wants to show off, consciously or subconsciously. Fuck that, I say, when I'm paying $30 a month of a membership, keeping to myself and trying hard, the last thing I want is the turd-teacher up on the wall narrating the sequence.
I've come to two possibilities.
1. I'm an outrageous dick, who needs to be more open to people like turd-teacher
2. I have finer taste in who I want to talk to and be friends with, hence my innate ability to pick out the gems and scoff at the turds.
In other news, I turn 23 in a matter of days. In true fashion I will be out at Lost Horse for the Boulder Bash, getting beyond fucked up on beer and maybe some bouldering in between the 120z curls.